No More Pity Parties

Postpartum depression has consumed too much of my life. It nearly prevented me from bonding with my son. Some of my relationships with close friends have been strained. Today I have decided to take my life back. For one I’m going to make amends with the people who I have lost touch with.

I’m also in the process of making a schedule that consist of a longer nighttime routine so me and my son can have some serious one on one time.

To do list

1. Write apology letter to mom for being emotionally draining. Assure her I’m taking better care of myself and let her know things will be smoother.
2. Pay my sister for watching the baby
3. Set up a girls night for the people I have been neglecting.
4. Write apology letter/love letter to boyfriend
5. Buy Taliyah Gift
6. Start baby schedule
7. Finish baby schedule

I could continue to feel sorry for myself and throw myself another pity party. I could get mad at my loved ones for not being more understanding, but I like this route much better.  No more pity parties!

Also I have been under so much stress lately and today was just such a big release for me. Some of you have been unfortunate enough to never have to collect unemployment. Let me explain to you how this works.

Every week they give you a certain amount. Your employer can try to contest your unemployment claim. The unemployment office pays you before your employer even has a chance to contest the claim. So that means you will be getting benefits for about two to three weeks before a decision is even made.  If your employer wins you have to pay the money back. If you win your employer gets a second chance to appeal your claim. This time a hearing is done by telephone and you will have received benefits for a couple of months.

 I had been collecting unemployment for about 11 weeks when I got a letter in the mail saying my job was appealing my benefits and if they won the appeal I would have to pay back all that money I had received.

What kind of organization gives you compensation before it has been awarded to you? This was frustrating and stressful. My previous employer wrote very nasty things about me, they sent the unemployment office every write up I had ever gotten. I knew for sure I’d lose the case and I would have to pay back a couple thousand dollars.

Well I prayed and fasted once a week about the situation. A hearing was done by telephone. My previous employer told vicious lies about me and they even hired a third party agency to represent them. I had no representation and no proof that I had been wrongfully terminated. While employed I received several awards but I stupidly through them in the garbage. Things just didn’t look too good for me.

Today I received a letter in the mail saying I won the hearing. I feel as if a heavy burden has been lifted off my shoulders.